In this morning's edition of the U-T, Kevin Acee wrote of the Chargers' inaction thus far in free-agency. While teams like the Chiefs are bringing players in the Chargers are sending them out.
Fans are voicing a growing concern but so are the veterans still on the Chargers' roster. These concerns have led players to begin querying Kevin Acee as to the goings-on at Chargers park.
"WT (redacted) are we doing?" read one (of numerous) texts I received from Chargers players this week.
This speaks volumes about the new Telesco/McCoy regime. Or does it?
Fortunately we were able to obtain some other anonymous texts sent to Kevin Acee. Let's see if we can get a handle on things.
"Can you tell them my name is not Ronald. And it's not Reggie either."
Hmmm. Identity issues . . .
"It's hard to tie laced-shoes so I started wearing these slip-on shoes. Have they said anything about my shoes? Or my arms."
Who would go the Crocket & Tubbs route with their footwear?
"Hey Kev, don't tell anyone, but I think Tiffany is pregnant again. There's no way we're restructurin' that contract."
Children require cash. I wouldn't restructure my deal either.
"Have they seen my letter, Kev? With the hit? And the blood?"
When you want something you gotta ask. Sometimes a well thought out letter will do the trick.
"If Telesco ain't gonna make me an offer then I don't want to hear a thing. Tell him to shut his mouth."
I believe it's ". . . then shut your mouf."
"With Q on his way out, Antonio and I are the most tenured players. They say anything about making me a Captain?"
Clearly this is referencing Quentin Jammer and Antonio Gates. Who's begging for leadership?
"I can't believe they paid me first. Rich special-teamer FTW!"
"Asking for a friend, black or white finger tape this season?"
Tough one . . .
"Can't talk right now, no . . . reception."
Oooh. Oooh. Oooh. That is fantastic.
"I've been studying and think I have finally gotten a handle on Coach Turner's offensive system. Going to be a big year."
Uh oh . . .
"Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot that he himself could not eat it?"
The answer is yes.
"Yes. My back still hurts"
Of course it does.
It is our understanding that more texts exist. Have you seen any?
Special thanks to Orz, Superduperboltman, John Gennaro, and Richard Wade for input/hacking Kevin Acee's phone.