NFL Week One: Who You Should Root For

This may not be the case for everyone, but in my experience sports are much more entertaining when there's a clearly defined rooting interest. Since you're reading this, I'm going to assume you're a Chargers fan. If you're not, well, then I don't really care about you, so that changes nothing. With no games yet played, we're first going to see how a game impacts the Chargers' chances of winning the division. If it doesn't we'll move on to the Wild Card.

All of this week's games after the jump:

We'll start with one that shouldn't disappoint. The Chargers likely won't be competing for a playoff spot with either of these teams as the Bears are in the NFC and the Colts are expected to be terrible. That said, the Colts theoretically could challenge for the AFC Wild Card. Root for the Bears.

Philadelphia Eagles @ Cleveland Browns

This game gives us basically the same dilemma as the first one and for the same reasons. The Chargers play Cleveland later in the season, though, so you have to ask which is more likely: Cleveland challenging for the Wild Card or the Chargers going to a Strength of Victory tie breaker. SOV is either the 4th or 5th tie breaker depending on the situation. Root for the Eagles.

St. Louis Rams @ Detroit Lions

This game has essentially no chance of impacting the Chargers' playoff hopes this year. I hate the Lions after last season, though, and you should too. Root for the Rams.

Miami Dolphins @ Houston Texans

If we're being optimistic (and it's Week 1 so we are), then the ultimate goal for the regular season is still Home Field Advantage through the playoffs. Miami isn't a contender for anything other than worst record in the NFL. Houston has a soft division and will challenge for HFA. Root for the Dolphins. (Ed. Note: Damn it.)

Atlanta Falcons @ Kansas City Chiefs

This is an easy one. An NFC team is playing a division rival. Root for the Falcons. (Ed. Note: Yay!)

Jacksonville Jaguars @ Minnesota Vikings

The Jaguars are not expected to contend, but the Vikings aren't even in the conference. Root for the Vikings.

Washington Redskins @ New Orleans Saints

In a battle of NFC teams, we'll pull for the one that could eventually benefit us when it comes to tie breakers even if we have to hold our noses to do it. Root for the Saints.

Buffalo Bills @ New York Jets

The Chargers will play the Jets later this season, but the Jets are also more likely to be challenging for a Wild Card spot than the Bills are. Root for the Bills. (Ed. Note: Wow, that was awful.)

New England Patriots @ Tennessee Titans

The Patriots are a much bigger threat to the Chargers playoff hopes than the Titans are this season and our boys play the Titans next week. Root for the Titans. (Ed. Note: At least the Titans are dinged up for next week.)

Seattle Seahawks @ Arizona Cardinals

This game has not effect on our Chargers, but I figure the more the Cardinals lose the better Lindley's chances of getting on the field. Root for the Seahawks.

San Francisco 49ers @ Green Bay Packers

This game won't matter to the Chargers' playoff hopes, but after the crap Harbaugh pulled in the preseason, this is an easy one. Root for the Packers.

Carolina Panthers @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers

The Chargers play both of these teams this season. Logically we should root for the one the Chargers have a better chance of beating. They play the Panthers at home. Root for the Panthers. (also screw Vincent Jackson)

Pittsburgh Steelers @ Denver Broncos

I have not the words to express how much I hate the Pittsburgh Steelers. Still, you can't in good conscience root for an AFC West team at this point in the season. Root for the Steelers. (I need to throw up now)

Cincinnati Bengals @ Baltimore Ravens

The Chargers play both of these clubs at home this year. The Baltimore Ravens look like the better team. Root for the Bengals.

San Diego Chargers @ Oakland Raiders

Don't be stupid.