That Did Not Look Athletic is a weekly series where we look at some of the least athletic plays during the previous week'sgame. This series is meant to give us a few laughs by showing that even the best athletes in the world have their moments of shame. It's also a reminder that you aren't a complete loser just because you punched at a tether-ball and fell down in front of a bunch of 3rd graders.
Monday was terrible on so many levels and it all started with a group-text from my brother: We only have 7 guys for softball. Do we want to forfeit or try to pick-up players at the field?
Since the softball game was slated for a 6pm start against the best team in the league and the Chargers MNF game was scheduled for a 5:37 kickoff this was a no-brainer: forfeit that sh*t!
But of course we didn't forfeit, the brother still having playoff aspirations for our fledgling group of inconsistent has-beens and never-weres. So we picked up three players, one of which was a girl. I mean no disrespect. She was likely the best player on our team that night. Most of us spent the game checking the Chargers score on our phones, and we were generally excited as the Chargers jumped out to an early lead.
We lost that softball game 19-0. Who gets shutout in beer league softball? A bunch of un-athletic dudes, that's who!
Luckily the The game ended so I could get home and catch the second half of the Chargers and Broncos game in its entirety. Like I said: Monday was terrible on so many levels.
So, at least we have GIFs after a rough loss? Why, yes we do!
Robert Meachem: Undone by the turf monster.
One of the common refrains from fans on Monday night was the lack of a Vincent Jackson-type -- a receiver who possesses the ability to go up and get balls at their highest point. Yeah. Robert Meachem didn't do that. Yeah. Robert Meachem can't do that.
Philip's throws of imperfection . . . right through the hands of Antonio Gates.
Philip Rivers seemed to get the blame on this one during the game. It's not a great throw. It's semi-duckish. It's high. But you know what? Antonio Gates is a future Hall of Famer. Isn't that how he's usually discussed by
outside pundits everyone? It hit his hands and I think he should have caught it. He looked like me over at first base.
Trindon Holiday muffs a punt at his own 16 yard line.
I don't imagine returning punts is an easy job: You're on an island with ridiculously physical humans bearing down on you. Trying to kill you, really. As you prepare to catch the booming punt from Mike Scifres, Marcus Gilchrist stops just short and frantically screams in your ear, "You makin' TDNLA this week, b*tch!"
And BOOM, you've muffed a punt. Muff. The least athletic named play in football? Survey says . . .
Omar Bolden falls. Omar Bolden gets up. Omar Bolden runs and grabs ball. Omar Bolden gets blasted. Omar Bolden fumbles.
You know what is athletic? Darrell Stuckey's right arm. It should no longer be attached to his body. Unfortunately this GIF didn't feature Bolden's escapades prior to the fumble. My apologies.
The Turf Monster steals a Touchdown from Eric Decker.
We all need to be able to laugh at ourselves and nobody did it better than Eric Decker after this play.
If yall didn't see, they had trip wire out there tonight. I reported it to the NFL so an investigation is pending. #humblingmoment— Eric Decker (@EricDecker87) October 16, 2012
Well done, you stumbling fool.
Peyton Manning throws a pick-six to Quentin Jammer.
This was all about Peyton Manning's "tackle". Look at that again . . . not athletic or shear brilliance? Look at Peyton's attempt to leg-whip Jammer.
That hurts my groin/hip flexor. Lots of things hurt my groin/hip-flexor these day.
Losing badly right before halftime. Sorting out my hair. Feelin' it.
I really like Peyton Manning but his sideline faces and demeanor are far more comical than those of Philip Rivers. But his hair does look nice . . . for a guy with a forehead like a drive-in movie theater.
Ryan Mathews stiff-arms: two for one.
This is becoming a regular feature here on TDNLA. Mathews brutalizes TWO would be tacklers with his right palm and then lords it over tackler number 2. Haha. Number 2.
Philip Rivers and the worst play EVAR!
When the scoreboard read Chargers 24 and Broncos 7, my only worry as a fan was that Norv Turner would put his inferior tackles into positions of failure against the Broncos dominant pass rushers. Thank you, Norv Turner. Thank you for rewarding me! Gahhhhhhh!
My hair looks nicer than Peyton's.
I think this grooming took place after the Broncos went up 28-24. I suppose it doesn't matter. I see fingers going through hair but I want to know what's going through his brain.
Helloooooo . . . . Norrrrrrrrrrrv.
Whoooo . . . arrrrrrrrrrre . . . yoooooooou?
Echo. Echo. Echo. Echo. Echo.
Week 6 isn't over. There's a bye. Another week of pain! Wear it, brothers and sisters!
The "That Did Not Look Athletic" Archives