Talk radio outlets are just now breaking the news. Philip Rivers was vacationing in Europe and happened to stay at the same hotel as the Dalai Lama. In a shocking development he has converted to Buddhism and will be studying under the Dali Lama expanding his awareness and renouncing violence of all kinds. Quotes from sources say that Rivers will no longer play football as it goes against his new belief system. He wants to promote world wide harmony and finds football too violent to reconcile with these new beliefs.
This is another body blow to a team still recovering from last season's absence of Pro Bowler Shawne Merriman. Norv Turner has revamped the offense so that it entirely revolves around Rivers talents under center, the Chargers have lost their most vital cog. While Volek did perform well in the 2007 playoff game against the Colts; it's hard to picture him leading the team for the duration of the 2009 campaign. Just when things seemed to be looking up for the Bolts, disaster strikes.
With all that has happened the rumor mill has already cranked up around the NFL. One option would be to try and trade up to get Sanchez or Stafford in the draft; Josh Freeman will likely be available. In the ultimate irony, there have already been rumors of initial contact with the Falcons to see if they could pick up Vick with only a second day pick which would put Michael Vick in a Charger uniform at last; Vick having just missed being a Charger in 2000. The second rumor is almost too horrible to think about; unnamed sources claim the Broncos have also been contacted in regards to none other than Jay Cutler. Hold onto your hats, this off season is giving chaos a whole new meaning.
A press release from the Chargers has just been released here.
April Fools! Did I getchya?